Fatty McFatFat

It has come to my attention, that resident Never Finisher fatty McFatFat has been slandering me and my slight overweightness on his blog (see link to right). Well, I, for one, am not going to stoop to his level and engage in some silly. sixth grade insult war. I am not like his beloved Republican politicians who like to engage in smear campaigns and innuendo.

I, for example, will not call anyone and ask, "What would you say if I told you that Mr. McFatFat once ate an entire box of Ring Dings and then, still starving, chowed down on the wrappers as well?"

Nor will I, for example, send out a mass email to the entire student body stating that "Mr. McFatFat is out sick today. You may feel free to not lock up your lunches."

And, obviously, I would certainly not tell my classes that they should all say an additional prayer for Fatty during Morning Prayer. A special Hali Mary for his Dickie-Do.

Nor would I answer them when they asked me "What's a Dickie-Do?" I would certainly never tell them that it means Fatty McFatFat's gut sticks out more than his dicke do.

I, for one, will take the high road. Let FMFF take the low road.

He has to. It has the higher weight limit.